This is not my fantasy

I was invited to participate in a friend's fantasy football league. Such an opportunity for mass distraction could not be passed up. So I signed up and proceeded to get down to business.

First I sifted through the bajillion pieces of information about each and every player in the NFL. I created a catalog of desirable players, grouping them by position, expected points and weakness of opposing defenses. From there I estimated when each player would be likely taken in the draft and proceeded to lay out a plan several optimal draft strategies depending on what number I ended up picking.

Or rather, that's apparently what I should have done.

What I did was briefly look at the list of 200 or so players and try to figure out which names looked most familiar. Then, when the actual draft started I picked randomly from the list of the 40 or so names I recognized until they were all gone. At this point I had about 4 of the required 12 players. After that, I picked based on how much I liked their uniforms*.

Most of my players underperformed. My starting running back is injured. And the resulting 117 - 74 route to a team called "Maerling's Muppets" does not bode well for the future.

* In fact, I didn't do that. Though I wish that I had. It was made difficult by the fact that they don't show the uniforms with the draft information.